[May 26, 2026]A friend visited me this afternoon, and I felt much better, I love their company. Let's call them R. They gave me two drawings of two of my oc's, and I couldn't express my happiness properly :). Afterwards, we did what we always do when they're here: we watched something and talked, and that was enough to make my day. Btw, we finished watching Lily Chou Chou, and what a good movie... although we didn't understand much of it. Anyway, if you ever read this, R, know that I love you very much (I also love you guys J and C :3) Maybe someday ill take some time to talk about my other friends

[May 26, 2026]Today is my birthday, AND I HATE BIRTHDAYS. I wish I could erase this date from people's minds, that would be better. I don't think I deserve to hear "I hope you have many years of life" or anything positive. I'm not okay, just leave me alone. The worst part is my relatives because I have A LOOOT... I just woke up and my mom wanted me to sit down and listen to a message from ALL of them saying the same thing, grrrr, hate, hate. I didn't even want to be born to begin with. To this day I haven't done anything useful in my life, and look, it seems like someone who's 19 is COMPLETELY USELESS, DUMB AND AN ID1OT. I don't know how to do anything, NOTHING that could help me, idk, like... being smart enough 2 get a job or something like that. All my "incredible skills" are useless. What's the point of knowing how to draw, what's the point of knowing how to paint, what's the point of doing other sh1t if they're ALL USELESS TO ME? Just k1ll me already and f*ck this sh1t, I'm sick of living in this world being useless, I don't want to live another second like this. Hate.

[May 21, 2026] I don't know if it's just tiredness from yesterday or if I'm sad again. Since I left high school, I've been living in a cycle of being normal and happy for a while, then depressed, then happy, then depressed, then happy, and so on... but I think it's just tiredness because yesterday I went with my dad and my aunt to my dad's radiotherapy appointment (which is practically all day). I even went with my new headphones that arrived but I didn't post them here (I forgot). The battery is really good, I used them from 5 am to 4 pm and when I checked, they were at 95%, and since I love listening to music, I practically had them on 99% of the time. One of the songs that stood out was Puzzle Heart by Mr. Kitty; every day I discover a new song by him (although I've been listening to him since 2021, it's only this year that I've been listening to him more). And about my dad, he's fine... like, really fine, I won't go into details for privacy reasons.

[May 17, 2026] I want a job, BUT NO ONE WANTS TO GIVE ME ONE! I've already interviewed at two local supermarkets and they haven't called me back. One of my friends said it might be because I can't maintain eye contact, but like, jskcabkjekcnbaskjcbaskjc >:(... I must have some kind of problem. Anyway, I noticed the site has 2 followers, well that's good :D thank you two people for following, I love you guys!

[May 14, 2026] Working on this page! It might take me longer because I've started playing osu again :p. Also, I need to add something more to both this page and the other one, they seem so...empty, I don't know :p